My Life Is My Message

Another week here has come and gone and I can’t even believe that means that I am officially in my last week and come home in less than a week. Way too many mixed emotions still about my return home so I’m going to continue putting off thinking about it and get back to that later in the week. 

This last week seriously just flew by. Another volunteer (a fellow Big Ten girl from Penn State!) and I made a plan for our last two weeks to make sure we did and saw everything we wanted to before we left so we’ve been pretty busy trying to go to all the little sights around the city and get back to those we didn’t feel like we really soaked up! 

Well of course things don’t always go according to plan. Monday night India finally got the best of my stomach and I got sick. I really thought I was going to defeat the “you will definitely get sick in India” statement that everyone told me, but it just didn’t happen. I remember the first time I got sick at OSU and just crying to my mom on the phone that I just wanted to be in my own bed with her there to take care of me. Well I was feeling just like that only I was half way around the world this time. Being sick sucks, being sick in a foreign country REALLY sucks. I didn’t eat for like two days, I missed a day with my kids and really just couldn’t move off my bed. No fun. The saddest part though? My love affair with Indian food has come to a screeching halt. Just the smell at the moment makes my stomach churn. My bread and rice diet isn’t really my style and I’m hoping to try and slowly work a little real food back into my diet this last week. Besides the food though I feel a million times better and survived Indian Illness without too much damage. 

This last week at school was a good and bad one continuing with incredible highs but also some really sad and frustrating lows. I have a couple kids who have just come so far with their english and are doing so well. They couldn’t even identify letters well when I started and within the last two weeks have just taken off and were sounding out words and writing them like champs on Friday. With the staff changes I’ve talked about I feel really good that when I leave this will all continue too with new volunteers that come and these kids english will only continue to get better! I haven’t had success everywhere though. At some points I’ve gotten thrown in front of 10-15 kids who speak zero english, have never been in a classroom before and don’t know anything and am just told to teach them. Most seem to have no interest in what I am saying and are laying on the ground or crawling on the table. The language barrier makes it impossible to control them and its really frustrating and just not fun to sit there and scream A, B, C pointing at letters when you feel like none of them even care. It makes it even harder to know that they will probably never actually learn english, or Hindi for that matter. Some of then were nine or ten years old and had never been in a school. Its really hard to think about that sometimes and take in how common this is all around the country and all around the world for that matter. I could just go on for days about how these kids break my heart every single day. I just can’t even wrap my mind around what I’ve seen here sometimes and what these kids lives are like. I have been avoiding the thought that this is my last week. I have no idea how I’m going to say goodbye to these kids who have gotten to know over the last 6 weeks. Not surprising, they have taught me ten times more than I could ever teach to them. 

My India trip was complete this weekend when I finally got to go Gandhi Smriti (In memory of Gandhi) yesterday. It is the place where Gandhi spent his last 144 days and was assassinated. Most of you probably know that this was an absolutely amazing moment for me. I got to walk where Gandhi walked and be in the room where he slept and worked and fasted and prayed. I was probably more in awe and amazement being there than any other place I’ve been in India. There was a pretty elaborate museum also connected which kind of disappointed me. It had some cool things but I found it pretty sad that such an expensive, extravagant thing was built in honor of a man who built his life around living simply and with only what he needed. But walking around the grounds was just amazing. Gandhi quotes were everyone (so clearly we all know I was happiest girl alive) and signs and pictures about his last few days alive. I know none of you will but if you ever get the chance I would really suggest his autobiography “The Story of My Experiments with Truth”. It’s long and a little boring at some points but totally worth it. Like I’ve said, my Gandhi fascination really started my India fascination and landed me here in this amazing country all summer! The title of the post is another very famous Gandhi quote that I think is a good thing for everyone to try and life their life by :) 

Hope everyone in all corners of the world is having a great week. I can’t believe how soon I’ll be home and especially how soon I’ll be starting up school again!! I’m so proud of so many of my amazing friends doing amazing things this summer and this upcoming year. From Grace and Steph playing with kids in Africa all summer to Carley on clinical in Belize. Lainie will be off saving the world in Bolivia, Kara in the Dominican while Mary Rose and Ryan stick to the good old USA to make a difference. I am so proud of all of you and am so lucky to have you all in my life!! (for some lighter reading besides Gandhi read up about Steph, Carley & Lainie's adventures here!) 

One more week of running around India until I must return to the real world! Love and miss you all :) And I promise pictures next time, the internet just isn't loving me today!